Netflix
by Pezberryluv4life
Summary: It all started with Netflix and soon Netflix becomes their own bubble to explore. What happens when that bubble pops?
1. Chapter 1

M for future chapters. I don't own glee or anything Shonda related. Might make into a multiple chapter fic.

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Netflix

Chpt. 1

It all started with Netflix. Rachel sat there staring at the screen with her mouth hanging wide open. She couldn't believe that Santana had cleared the queue list and left the L Word for her. It had to be a mistake or a very cruel joke.

Santana sat at the diner laughing to herself. She could just picture the look on Rachel's face when she got all comfortable and turned on Netflix. "Hahaha, she'll learn about touching my queue list." Santana, being Santana, had to teach Rachel a lesson now and nip this is the bud or she would be going thru another, "where the hell are all my CD's Berry" situation again. You see, Rachel has a habit of slowly and rudely taking over peoples' stuff. She never moved too fast and before you could look up and stop it, it would already be done.

When I got back to the loft, the first thing I heard was Rachel's voice nagging. "All I'm trying to do is show you some culture. There is more than bad reality T.V. and Shonda Thursdays. And what could I possibly learn from a group of friend who happen to be lesbians living in LA. I am not lesbian nor do I live in LA."

"A lot if you ask me" Santana said while coming thru the loft door. "We both secretly know that you fantasize about licking the va jay jay and that you use the bathroom while I'm in the shower to catch a look at the goods. And I thought we talked about shorten those paragraph you speak in. Remember short and to the point, just like those shorts you're wearing." smirked Santana grabbing a beer and sitting on the kitchen counter.

"You want short and to the point. Okay." Rachel mumbled to herself while she slowly raised her shirt over her head. She slowly swayed her way over to Santana and climbed up and straddles Santana. In the huskiest voice Santana has ever heard, Rachel says "You and me naked right here right now. No, no wait. I can shorten that." "You. In. Me. Now." She adds while licking the shell of Santana's ear.

Santana sits there for a second speechless. Her body betrayals her and responds immediately as she feels her pants tighting, "Holy shit!" finally comes out of her mouth. Rachel moves off of Santana's lap with an unnatural smirk on her face.

Simultaneously the loft is filled with "See you're not the only one that can play games, Santana" and "No wait, comes back."

"What did you say?" Rachel asked

"Huh?" Santana shot back quickly. "Nothing, nothing" Santana jumps off the counter and beelines for the bathroom.

While Santana scurried off to the other side of the loft, Rachel busies herself with putting back on her shirt while trying to hide the blush that was rising up her neck to her face. "I need a distraction, immediately!". She turns back to the T.V. and hit play, not remembering her problem with the selected series, and ten minutes into the first episode Rachel is blushing for a new reason.

"Thought you didn't have anything to learn." Rachel jumped to turn off the T.V. when she suddenly hears Santana's voice right behind her.

"I wasn't watching it, it was just playing in the background. I was just thinking about alot." Rachel quickly turns around and mumbles out and notice that Santana is wearing nothing but a towel. Rachel watches a drop of water roll down Santana's neck until it disappeared in her cleavage. 'What am I doing? I'm not attracted to Santana. My sexuality has never been defined but still this is Santana. But she did feel amazing pressed up against me. What the hell am I saying? I can't do this right now' Rachel is having a inner dialogue that is cut short when she hears Santana say something.

"Uh huh" replied Santana "Come on, you can tell Auntie Tana. Did you like watching the lesbians tasting each other's tacos?"

Rolling her eyes and hiding her blush, Rachel ignores Santana and retreats to the bathroom. "I guess I will finally have to experience a cold shower." Rachel says while turning on the shower.

Meanwhile in Santana's new section of the loft, which is Kurt's old room and he moved out last week, Santana is having a dialogue with herself.

"You can't do that anymore. This is our secret and you're giving it away." She says looking at the dick. "Yeah yeah, I know she has the longest legs and the softest hair but she is our friend. We can't go there." Her dick twitched just think about the position that they had been on the kitchen counter and how sexy Rachel sounded. 'she probably has the softest lips' "Ahhh, what am I going to do?" she says falling back onto bed and staring at her semi-hard dick.

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Please review and comment. Thinking about making this into a multiple chapter fic but depends on responds.


	2. Chapter 2

I loved the response from the first chapter so I decided to continue with this story. Please review and comment. Rated M. I do not own Glee, The L Word, or Netflix.

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For the past two weeks, Santana and Rachel have been chilling together every night finishing the third season of the L Word. Both have enjoyed it more than expected.

Tonight was no different. Rachel laid across Santana's chest between the legs, on a pillow. Santana could feel herself hardening every time Rachel would move and was sweating bullets wanting the show to end already. She breath relief as she saw the credits rolled.

"Although I fought it in the beginning but I can't wait to start season 4. I still can't believe that Bette cheated on Tina. And SHANE! If I was Carmen, I would hunt her down and kill her." Rachel said walking from the kitchen, handing Santana a beer.

"Why would you do that. Carmen knew what she was getting into and she shouldn't have gotten her hopes up." replied Santana

"How can you say that, Santana? No one deserves to be left at the altar!" Rachel yelled while falling onto the couch in her seat.

"I'm not saying she deserved it, I'm saying she should have expected something to happen. She said it herself, she was marrying the unattainable."

"So you're saying just because someone is a certain way, you should expect them to stay that way and not change, even a little, for the better?" qestioned Rachel frowning at Santana

"No, not at all, I'm saying if the person wants to change, then they will. But if you want the person to change when you're ready and not when their ready, it will never work. The person changing has to be willing and ready and Shane wasn't."

Rachel shook her head understanding. She couldn't help but think of Finn and him not being ready to live their lives together in New York.

"Hey, hey now. No thinking of him or what could have been. No pouty face or I'll tickle you." Santana quickly said trying to make Rachel smile.

"No you won't." Rachel simply replied forgetting who she was living with.

Santana eyebrows raised up surprised, "Really? You don think so, huh?"

"You wouldn't dare." challenge Rachel.

Santana finished her beer and walked to the kitchen to throw the bottle away, "you're right Rachel. You don't have to dare me, I will do it anyway." Suddenly Santana lunged towards the couch and had Rachel pinned, tickling her sides.

"Oh oh oh my- sttttooppp. Santana, stop!" Laughed Rachel as she tried to make her escape.

"Say All Hail Queen Santana."

"Neverrrrrrrrrr" squealed Rachel while kicking out from under Santana. All of a sudden, she felt Santana hands dropped and watched her as she rolled around on the floor screaming in spanish. Rachel knew that most of the words were cuss words after living with Santana long enough. "Santana are you ok? Why are holding your hands there like that?"

"CUZ YOU KICKED ME IN THE BALL, RACHEL!" yelled Santana still in pain.

Rachel felt horrible, "I'm so sorr-wait, WHAT!?"

Santana eyes widen, realizing what she said. 'I guess it's now or never' thought Santana before she started to explain. "I was born with a penis." She said looking right into Rachel's eyes. She quickly looked back at the ground and continued. "I'm 100% female but I was born intersex. Please don't kick me out. I know I'm a freak but I have nowhere else to go." she begged.

Rachel slowly walked over to her, "I don't ever want to hear you call yourself that again and I would never kick you out. You are my best friend, beside Kurt, and who would I have my Netflix dates with?"

Santana got up and walked to her room. Before she disappeared out of sight, she turned to Rachel and said "Thank you."

Rachel blushed replying, "you're welcome. We still on for tomorrow, right?"

"Of course." And with that Santana was gone for the rest of the night.

-In The Living Room-Rachel's POV

Rachel blushed as she remember what Santana body felt like pushed on top of her. 'Ok, ok stop it. Santana has a penis. So what. She is still the sexiest woman I have ever seen. I wonder if this is why she keeps everyone at an arms length and she doesn't get into serious relationships. Well I got to help her change that. Her soulmate is out there and she might run them off if she keeps this up. I'm going to make it my mission to crack my bestie hard shell.' Rachel thought to herself.

-In Santana's Bedroom—Santana's POV

"Breathe Santana, breathe. She knows now. No more big secrets. It's just Rachel and Santana. No big deal. Right? Right?" She said looking at her dick like it would really answer. "She is still our friend, so no funny business like that tickling shit. But her skin is so soft and her laugh is beautiful music…oh shit this just got married." huffed Santana.


	3. Chapter 3

First, thank you for reading and review. It makes me feel like people actually like what I write. Second, I haven't abandoned the stories. I just going through papers/finals. So once school calms down, I will be back. I'll try to find some time over Thanksgiving to write something. I'm just starting with writing fanfiction so my ideas are few right now. In the mean time, I want to hear from y'all. Give me plot twist, obstacles, or whatever and I'll try to add them to the story. Thank you for your patience. More to come soon.

Ciao


	4. Chapter 4

**I do not own glee or any characters. G!p story. Don't like, don't read it. All mistakes are mine. Rated M.**

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Chapter 3

"Did I just say 'just got married'? What the hell is wrong with me? Why am I even thinking about Rachel and marriage? I need a drink." Santana sighed to herself. She peeked her head out of her "door" and listened for any sounds of Rachel.

"All clear. I'm on my way to bed anyway." Rachel's voice suddenly boomed as she walked from the bathroom to her 'door', wearing wet hair and her silk robe.

Santana jumped at the closeness of Rachel's voice. "Shit, Rachel. You and your damn ninja feet. You gave me a heart attack." 'When did her robe get so short? Why doesn't she have anything on underneath that thing? Why is she all wet? Shower, duh. I really need to chill' Santana thought to herself. Suddenly Santana grunted and lost all the air in her lungs when Rachel jetted out and hugged her tight around her stomach.

"Good night Santana." Rachel whispered as she slowly removed herself from Santana.

'She has got to stop looking at me like that with those big beautiful eyes.' "Nite, Rach".

Rachel suddenly felt herself pinned against the wall with the softest lips pressed against hers. "Mmmmm" she moaned as she gave into the powerful lips and tongue that was caressing her own and giving her a burning feeling in her core.

Moans escaped from both of them while hands roamed all over the other's body. Santana pushed Rachel against the wall, while Rachel tried to melt their bodies together. Santana's hand caressed Rachel's leg up to her thigh, while sucking the pulse point on her neck. In one fluid motion, Santana brought Rachel's leg up around her waist and lick from her neck all the way up to her earlobe. Simulatiously, the girls whispered, "Oh my God!", "I love you."

It was too much too fast, Santana pulled back and rested her forehead on Rachel's. They sat there in silence breathing in each other's air for a minute, until Rachel finally couldn't hold it in any longer. "What did you say-", she is cut off by Santana pushing her finger to Rachel's lips. Shaking her head no, she give Rachel what feels like a ghost of a kiss on the lips, turned and walked out the front door.

-Santana's POV-

As I walk to the roof, my mind is wondering, a little too much for me. 'I got call Quinn. Fuck!', I thought as I put the phone on speaker and it began to ring.

"Hey Lopez"

"Hey Ice Queen, sorry to….no actually I'm not."

"What did you do now? Did you tell her? No, you're too much of a pussy to do that. What is something stupid that you would do? Did you bring home some random and have her screaming and moaning all night? Did she get a new boyfriend?"

"1. Why is it that you think that _I_ did something? And 2. Shut up"

"Well when I get high school Lopez on my phone at 2 in the morning, you've fucked up. So just tell me what you did so I can help you fix it."

"You know what, never mind. I don't know why I called you."

"San, wait. Seriously what's wrong?"

"Ikissedher." Santana mumbled into the phone. Santana knew that after being best friends for years that Quinn could understood what she was saying.

"What?! When?! How?! Whoa, I wasn't wake before but I am now. Tell me what happen after you kissed her."

"Why does that even matter?"

"Just tell me."

"Well, I pulled back and we sat there for a while. Then, Rachel tried to say something but I stopped her and walked out the door and called you."

"YOU ARE SUCH AN IDIOT. Now she thinks that after you've gotten whatever out of your system, you've rejected her. You didn't even want to talk to her and you just left the house, probably to go drink or fuck your problems away. It is what you do best."

"That's insane. Rachel can't think all of that off one kiss. WAIT, why are we even talking about this? Rachel is straight and doesn't like me. So none of that makes sense."

"Listen, San. Whether you are ready to deal with your feeling for Rachel or if you want to believe me or not, you have to at least straighten things out. I know you love her but you two live together. You have to make sure everything is okay with "Roommate Rachel". And as one of your best friend and I'm only looking out for you when I say this, you can't keep harping over Rachel. It's been four years. No more drinking or fucking yourself into a coma. You have to start moving on babe.

"Uh huh."

"I'm serious S. This can't be Brittany 2.0, okay, Just talk to her. You never know what could happen."

"I can't. I'llmakeabiggerfoolofmyselfthanIalreadyhave."

"No you won't. Just use that famous Lopez charm. Don't stress yourself out and call me in the morning. Love you."

"Love you too. Thanks, Q."

"Anytime. Good night."

"Night."

"San, talk to her."

"Okay."

-Rachel's POV-

I didn't mean to sit outside the roof door and listen to Santana's conversation. I was really waiting for a good time to interrupt so I could talk to her about what just happen. But now that I've heard it…OH MY GOD. I've only ever had one girl crush and that is for Ms. Santana Isabella Lopez. I've told myself since middle school that if I was a boy, Santana would be the only girl for me. But I'm not gay so it is a fantasy that could never come true. Right?


	5. Chapter 5

"Hello? I'm right around the corner. I didn't forget!"

"Why didn't you ever tell me?"

"Well hello to you too Rachel, and how are you? I'm fine, thank you. Now what the hell are you talking about?"

"Santana. Quinn, I know you're still there. Now talk!" Rachel paced the park waiting on Quinn to show up.

"Watch it Rach. I love you and all but I'll still kill you. I'll explain when I get there." said Quinn as she pulled up to the little park. "Give me 2 minutes."

Rachel turned around and spotted Quinn's car and gave her a glare that would even have Santana second guessing right now. "120 second, Quinn Fabray. And I'll watch it when it's not one of my best friends lying to me. 119, 118, 117….click".

"That little midget hung up on me. Maybe she is spending too much time with Satan." Quinn paused for a second and took deep breaths. "What the hell am I going to say? Deep breath in….and out. I got this."

As Quinn walked across the park towards Rachel, she heard what sounded like counting. "Really?"

"8, 7, 6,….If you were a second late then I just would to have to tell Santana about your drunk escapades with Rick the Stick at the graduation party. I'm glad you decided to be punctual today. Now, get to talk."

Quinn sighed before she started, "I just want to remind you that years ago, when we actually started becoming friends, I said that if I'm going to be both of you guys friends that I would keep all information privately shared with me to myself. I never told Santana that you've known about her 'friend' since senior year of high school or did I tell her that you gave her a handjob last New Year's after she passed out."

Rachel gasped, "YOU DARED ME!"

"But you didn't have to nor did I tell, did I? No, so what did you want to ask me?" Quinn looked Rachel dead in the eye daring her to ask all the questions on the tip of her tongue.

Rachel slowly sat down on the bench and stared at the small pond. "I'm sorry. I can't ask you to betray either one of our trust. I just have so many questions."

"Rachel look at me. Look at me! I already know you love Santana but you aren't sure about yourself and I never told anyone that. I can't tell you anything but I can tell you what I don't know."

Rachel looked at Quinn like she had lost her mind, "what on earth are you talking about?"

Quinn rolled her eyes. She was trying to help without helping, "For example, Rachel does Santana eat grass on the weekends?"

"What?! No."

"But do you know that for sure?" Quinn raised her eyebrows praying that Rachel would catch the hint.

"No I don't know for sure but I've never seen her do that." Replied Rachel

"So it's information that you don't know either way?"

Rachel's eyes got huge, "ohhhhhhh, no no no I don't know. Got it." I just got to ask my questions strategically, Rachel thought to herself. "Sample questions first."

Quinn shook her head and stood up to look at the pond so Rachel couldn't read her face. "Just one thing, don't ask the obvious questions like does she like me and shit like that or I'll leave. I'm trying to help and trying not to hurt my relationship with Santana at the same time. Don't make me regret this."

"Is Santana last name Lopez?"

Quinn stood there in silence.

"Does Santana like cats?"

"No"

"Is Santana in a rock band?"

"IDK"

'Ok if the answer is yes, she won't answer at all and if the answer is no, then I get a verbal no. But if she has never gotten a definite answer, the answer is I don't know."

"Have I been blind to this for a long time?"

Silence

"Does she know how I feel about her?"

"No"

"Have I ever hurt her unintentionally because of her feelings?"

Silence again

"Is San about to give up and stop pursuing me?"

"IDK"

"Do you think it would be stupid to pursuit this?"

Quinn was not expecting this question. She slowly turned around and saw tears rolling down Rachel's face. "Rach, what's wrong? Come here." Quinn pulled Rachel into a bear hug trying to calm her down.

"I'm not gay, Quinn. So why do I feel like I want nothing more than to fall asleep and wake up in her arms, feel her lips on mine again, see what she feels like between my….."

"WHOAAAA, stop talking, stop, stop ,stop. Lalalalalalalalalalalalalalalala" Quinn suddenly screamed out. "Look, I don't want to hear all that. I know what it feels like to be confused about things and the only way to know for sure is to try. Talk to Santana and tell her all of this and if she is into you as much as I think she is, then she will work with you. Both of ya'll need to stop being chicken and peel the scab off and we both know that it is going to be you. I hope I helped in some way. Now it's dark and getting late and you need to go home, I know she's called you 10 times by now."

Rachel and Quinn walked to the parking lots and hugged one last time. "Thank you Quinn for all the help. Don't be a stranger. Love you."

"Set her straight for me okay? Love you too, Rach."

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	6. Chapter 6

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Rachel sat in her car ignoring yet another call from Santana.

"She going to kill me when I finally make it home." she whispered. "But I have to get through this email without interruption and hope that she would understand later. Almost done."

"…..heard horror stories about people being blackballed for being suspected of being gay. My life plans are changing and it's scaring me a little and if I decide to pursue…"

As Rachel went back to typing on her iPhone, she hoped that she was doing the right thing.

Back at the apartment, Santana was losing her mind, pacing back and forth in the living room blowing Rachel's phone up.

"Where the hell is she and why is she not answering the phone?" Santana shouted out loud. "If she is still alive and fine, I'm going to kill her." Santana growled when her phone finally started to ring. "Finally, a text from Rachel…'check your email'. What the hell?" Santana sat on the couch as she started to read.

~~~~~Santana's POV~~~~~

"Dear Santana,

I don't know what is going on between us but it needs to be resolved so I'll start. I can't deny it anymore. I have always had some feelings towards you but I need you to understand one thing, I can't be gay. It's not that I don't want to be but it's that I can't be. Believe me, I have no problem appreciating the female anatomy (which I've done multiple time of your anatomy) or people loving whoever they want to, just look at my dads', but my life has been all planned out with the Broadway career and the husband and 3 kids in the big house and two dogs since I was 7. Being gay on Broadway is not that big of a deal but I want to crossover into Hollywood and the music business and I have always heard horror stories about people being blackballed for being suspected of being gay. I'm just starting out in my career and I don't know if I want to jeopardize it. It seems as if I have to decide if I want to take that risk and give up a part of my dreams. I don't know if I'm ready to do that. My life plans seem to be changing and it's scaring me a little. Ok, a lot and if I decide to pursue this, I need you to be patient with me. I honestly hope this isn't just about sex or another conquest, like it usual is with you. Please text me and let me know when you are ready to have this talk, until then I'll be at Kurt's.

Forever, Rachel

P.S. your anatomy doesn't change anything."

"Holy shit. Is she fucking serious right now? Can't be gay? I've heard some bullshit but damn she created a whole new level. I need a drink."

I walked two blocks down the street to my favorite bar, Kisses, to say what's up to my favorite bartender. "Hey MiMi, pour it up, pour it up."

"What's wrong? Long night? It's only 7:30?" she asked while grabbing two shot glasses.

I stare at her like she's nuts but then I remember that she hasn't been living my life for the past 24 hours. "Oh trust me a lot can happen in a couple of hours of darkness!"

"Want to talk about it?"

"Maybe after about 20 shots." I pout, silence begging for bottle.

"You know that ain't happening but here's the first two." Mimi replies as she set the two glasses in front of me.

"You're an angel sent from heaven. Ohhhhh that one burned. What is it?" I ask as I slam the second shot.

"This new vodka we just got in today. Thought you might want to try it."

"Give me two more of those"

Mimi raises her eyebrow, "You remember our deal right?"

"Yeah, yeah for every four shots, I got drink a glass of water and talk. I still want them now, I need this. Trust me."

Mimi sighed and shook her head, "Must be about Rachel then. Here you go."

"When is it not?" resting my head on the coolness of the bar. "Read this" I mumbled as I pushed my phone on the bar.

"Drink this while I read"

"Yeah, yeah ok mom." I replied as I rolled my eyes and chug the water. I watched Mimi intensely for any reaction on her face. 'Nothing, not even a flutter of her eyelashes' I thought to myself.

Finally Mimi looked up and said two words, "That's deep."

"What? That's it? All you can say is 'that's deep'. What the fuck, Mimi? You're supposed to help me. What am I supposed to do?" I begged with the biggest puppy dog eyes and biggest pout I could mustard up.

Mimi bust out laughter "Are you pouting? Oh my god, where is my phone? I gotta take a picture of this."

"Uhhh, I hate you."

"1) No, you don't and 2) stop pouting like a big ass baby. I thought you were 'Santana Lopez, Angel by day & Badass all the time', unfortunately I can't help you on this one. This is an adult moment reserved only for you. I'll say this, whatever you do can't be wrong. She seems willing to try and apparently likes you for exactly who you are, she is your best friend."

"What if she chooses her career over me? What if I'm not worth it?" I whispered faintly.

Mimi looked at me for a second before walking around the bar and grabbing me by the arm, escorting me out. When we got outside, Mimi grabbed me by both of the shoulders and said, "Look, you know I don't like the "what if" game. There is either knowing or not knowing. So you wouldn't know until you try or you can walk around all your life not knowing, but that choice is up to you. You once told me that you would give anything just to have two minutes with her, that was all you needed and you could die happy. Here's your chance at those two minutes. It won't be easy and you will have to work hard sometimes but for something that you really want, all the hard work is worth it. Even if you don't get to keep it. Now go home and think about it." Mimi turned my body around and gave me a light push. "Call me at the bar when you get home."

As I started walking off, I stopped for a second, turned around and gave Mimi a hug. "Thanks." With that, I turned and started towards the apartment with a new found determination. Once I got home, I called Mimi and took a long shower. When I got out the tub, I grabbed my phone and texted Rachel.

S: R U coming hme 2nite?

R: No

S: U drive me loco!

R: Sorry

S: Plz cum hme

R: Thank you, but no thank you.

S: Rachel, will you please come home? I'm ready to talk.

R: Have you been drinking?

S: I'm sober

R: Be there in 10 minutes.

For some reason, my heart was racing out of my chest. "Now, I just have to sit here and wait. This is going to be a long night."

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 _Please review and comment and tell me what you think._


	7. Chapter 7

_I know it been a while. Started a new job and still going through training and then life happens. So I made a super long chapter for you all. I hope you like it._

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Santana paced the apartment as she waited for Rachel. "Why the hell did I tell her I'm ready to talk? I can't do this. I gotta go." Santana grabbed for coat and walked to the elevator. "What am I doing? I finally get my chance with Rachel and I'm walking out." In mid step, Santana turned around and went back to the apartment. The moment her hand was on the knob, she freaked out again. "She already said she can't be gay. She just coming to let you down easy. How could I be so stupid? That's it, I'm out of here."

As soon as she turned around to leave, the elevators doors opened. Santana rushed into the apartment and tried to act natural.

"Santana, are you home?" Rachel called out as she came through the door.

"Yeah, in the kitchen."

Rachel was beyond nervous, she was about to start a relationship with Santana Lopez. That's the scariest and most exciting thing in the world Rachel thought to herself. Now or never. Rachel took a deep breath and went to the kitchen.

"Hey"

"Hey" replied Santana

They sat there in an uncomfortable silence for a few moments.

"Soooo, that email. Wow!"

"Yeah, I know it was a lot but I had to tell you what was going on in my head without you interrupting or looking at me like that."

Santana gasped, "Like what?"

"Like you're picturing me with my clothes off" Rachel explained.

"I'm not picturing..." mumbled Santana. "Anyway, you wanted to talk soooo..."

"Before I say anything, please go first." said Rachel as she took a seat on the counter.

Santana took a deep breathe and mumbled, "...really like you..."

"I'm sorry Santana, I can't hear you. Could you please speak up?" asked Rachel.

Santana got louder, "I said look, I really like you and I don't get the whole can't be gay shit but I get it. You gotta think about your career and shit so it's cool."

Rachel just sat there and smiled, "I don't know if you understand how wonderful you are."

Santana gave Rachel a crazy look. "What?"

"You are one of the most selfless individuals I know. You act so tough all the time, but you are just a big soft teddy bear. I knew you going to say something like that but I've already made up my mind. There are plenty of people who sacrifice their dream for something or someone better. But I will be one of those people who have the best of both world. Sure, it might be a little tougher to break through some barriers but I'm ready and willing to put up the fight. Now, I only need one thing to make my final decision."

Santana sat on the edge of her seat waiting for Rachel to tell her what it was. _"I finally get to hold this angel in my arm and kiss her all night long. I get to look into her beautiful eyes and..."_ Santana's thoughts were suddenly interrupted,

"Kiss me."

"I'm sorry, say that again." Santana stuttered out.

Rachel grabbed Santana by her collar, pulled her between her legs until her lips ghosted over Santana's. "Kiss me."

Santana hesitated only for a second because she was still in a daze. She gentle caressed Rachel's face and moved in for a slow soft sensual kiss, as if it would be for the last time.

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Santana woke up shivering, "I knew she was a cover thief." She sat back for a minute reminiscing on last night.

 _..."take this off"..."mmmmmmmmh"..._

 _*Sucking in air thru her teeth*_

 _..."your body is so soft"..._

 _*deep breath*_

 _..."ohhhhh"..."deeper"..._

 _*biting, scratching, teasing*_

 _...right there, don't stop (moans)..._

Santana quietly climbed out of the bed knowing what she had to do. "Please forgive me." she whispered as she kissed Rachel on the head and left the room. Santana had already made up her mind the moment Rachel had walked through the door last night. She wanted her to live out her dreams and conquer Broadway and she couldn't be the reason why the world didn't know Rachel Berry. She sat down at the kitchen table to write Rachel a letter explaining just that. An hour later, Santana sealed the envelope, grabbed her stuff and walked to the Marine recruiting station.

"Good morning future Marine, I hope, how can I help you" said a sergeant as she walked through the door.

"I want to sign up today and leave as soon as possible." demanded Santana

"Whoa, whoa, whoa there. Let's slow down. I'm Sergeant Torres and why do you want to leave so soon." asked the sergeant.

"I'm doing the right thing for a friend and I need to leave before I change my mind", replied Santana. "I might as well do something productive while I figure out what to do with my life."

"Well looks like you're in the right place, young lady. Let's start the paperwork." The recruiter said while motioning for Santana to sit down. Across town, Rachel woke up feeling on top of the world. Being with Santana was everything that she had ever dreamed of.

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 **Five months later**

She had read the letter every day, by now she had it memorized. _Last night meant everything to me...Can't be the reason you don't live out your dreams...please don't be mad...marines...I'll write soon...forever yours._

"What the hell does that meant, forever yours. Is she talking about herself or is it just a letter ender? Ahhh, I can't figure this out. Go to hell, Santana", she mumbled to herself as she made her way to her second call back. Rachel was pissed that Santana up and bailed and didn't have the balls to say whatever she had to say to her face. She felt used, like she was just another notch in Santana's belt. She opened herself up to the one person she shouldn't have and her heart got crushed in the process. She would never forgive Santana for this. So she found something to focus on. Broadway, she was more determined to make it than ever before. She stopped by the mailbox before leaving. "Bill, bill, junk..."

Suddenly Rachel frozen in place and gasped, "Santana". She whispered it so soft she didn't know if she really said it out loud. Santana had finally written. Rachel took a seat on the hallway steps and just stared at the letter. She couldn't make up her mind whether she should open it now or wait till after her call back. Rachel stood and put the letter in her purse, "she couldn't wait her me then, now she has no choice" she stated as she walked out to catch a cab.

As she sat in the forever New York traffic, she kept glancing at the letter. It was like it was taunting her. She finally ripped the letter out of her purse and opened it. She held her breath as she started to read,

 _I didn't even know how to start this letter off. Rachel, Berry, Tiny, My Angel, there are so many so I'll let you choose. First, don't be mad at me. I'm sorry I missed your graduation but you looked gorgeous walking across the stage and like you grew six inches (cute heels lol). Somebody sent me a video. "Quinn", Rachel thought. I hope you don't mind me paying the rent out for a year. The landlord damn near didn't want to take it because "Miss Rachel wouldn't like this. Her own fathers can't pay her rent. She is very independent". But I persuaded him to do things my way ;-). I know you probably want to kill me because I left and it took me so long to write. I just hope you understand that I care about you and want to be with you every second of every day "then why aren't you idiot." and I hope that one day I can make up for whatever hurt I caused. I just couldn't be the water that put of Rachel Berry flame, I couldn't keep you all to myself and not share your amazing talents with the world. I couldn't live with myself knowing that. So I made a decision that was best for us. I know you and the anger that you have for me right now is fueling you thru those audition and callbacks for Sandy (I can't believe they're reviving that...you already got this part, don't sweat it.) I do and still have feelings for you and I know that means nothing on paper combined with my actions but if you never feel the same way I understand. You were my friend before anything and I hope we can stay that way. I'm fine, don't worry about me. Keep being a star._

 _Santana_

Rachel wiped the tears she felt on her face. "Ahh I hate you for this" she whispered to herself.

"That'll be $17.50" the cab driver voice suddenly boom and startled her.

"Huh?"

"$17.50"

"Oh of course. I'm sorry, here you go keep the change. Thank you" replied Rachel as she got out at her destination. She stuffed the envelope into her purse and inside.

After her callback, Rachel decide to go to the park to sit and think for a while. On one side, she was happy. She had gotten the part. The director said it was her heartfelt rendition of "Hopelessly Devoted" that sealed the deal. They said she had so much feeling and emotion that she made them believe she was living the song and not just playing a part. _"Ironic, huh"_ she thought. On the other side, she was hurt all over again.

"Hey Rach" Quinn said as she sat next to her. "I know that I haven't really let you rant like you want and the letter just bust the door wide open so I'll get you two minutes."

"I just can't believe she went and join the marines. Quinn! The marines. That's was so stupid! She going to get herself killed. And why would she let that night happen if she was just going to leave. Do you know what I did for her? Does she know what I did for her? I gave her my virginity and she run off like I'm just one of those floozies she messes with. Why do I have to feel like this? She doesn't care so why can' I? Next time you talk to her tell her I said fuck off! I just... Aaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! I hate her, I hate her, I hate her! "

Quinn jumped up when Rachel said crying halfway through her rant and held her in a bear hug. Rachel starting pounding into her chest towards the end but Quinn just held on tighter. "It's okay. It's okay. I wish I had the answers for you."

Rachel sighed heavily and started walking to home, "thank you, Quinn for everything" she shouted over her shoulder as she continued walking. Once Rachel arrived home, she sat down and wrote Santana back. She walked the letter straight to the post office and drop the letter in the post box. She turned around, dusted her hands off and stated "the show must go on" and walked home.

 **Two weeks later**

"Mail call, mail call. Braxton, Green, Hightower, King, Lopez..."

"Here" Santana answered as she retrieved her letter. "Rachel!" She quickly opened the letter before her face fell.

 _Lopez,_

 _1\. Thanks for the rent thing, it was actually kind of nice._

 _2\. Be safe_

 _3\. Stop stalking_

 _4\. I hate you._

 _5\. GO TO HELL_

 _Rachel_

"Shit" was all Santana could say.


	8. Chapter 8

Hola human readers, I know it's been a while and I'm sorry. I have a lot of ideas but I don't really know how to write it out. Writers Block is being nice, I'm just not much of a writer. I've been looking for someone to write with, but no avail. If anyone is interested, inbox me. In the mean time, I wrote this out because the story was on my mind but didn't really know where to take it. Hope you enjoy.

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Chapter 7

12 months later

"Why hasn't she wrote? I thought I was her all and everything. Then where the hell is she?" ranted Rachel.

"I don't know Rach. The last I heard was the last letter she sent you. You know what I know." Quinn responded. "Read it to me again"

Rachel,

I know that you've gotten all my letters. I mean I've only written about a hundred. Anyway I'll say what I always say and a bit extra. I miss you with all my heart. I hope one day you can forgive me. I had to find myself. I'll always be thinking of you and I have to go on tour. Not like Drake or Miss Streisand, but a military tour out in a foreign country. Everything is going to be okay and I will write as soon as possible. Please don't worry and break a leg every night. I'll listen to you every night and tell Quinn not to worry either. One day I'm going to marry you. Love always,

Lopez

"I have it memorized but it still doesn't help. What the hell happen? That was 9 months ago. She dropped off the face of the planet. She's ok huh? She better be dead! Ahhhhhhh!"

Quinn sat Rachel down on the couch, "I'm such she's fine. She's Santana Badass Lopez. She probably just can't find a pen. You know how she is. 'It's not lost it strategically place, I know where everything is'. All that order has to be messing up her messy ways."

Rachel looked up and giggled, "Don't make me laugh Quinn, I'm mad."

"I had to do something. You were killing me. Look let's just get you ready for the show. Tonight is the big night, the producer from Wicked right?" Asked Quinn.

"Yes, I'm so nervous which makes me think about Santana which makes me more nervous. I just ahhhhhhhh….." Rachel slumped over. "I love her Quinn. I always have. She's just so ahhhhhhh…"

Quinn smirked a little, "I know, Rachel. She loves you too. Think about all the shit that Santana has done. It's always looks bad but it's to protect you. Joining the glee club, ragging on Finn all the time, sleeping with him, trying to kill you after "the kiss that miss", being a super bitch to you, making sure you got on that train. It was all to show you that Finn was not "the One" and to get out of Lima, Ohio. Shit, she finally moved her to make sure you were doing what you always said you would and to be closer and show her true self without all the high school drama. Even running off to join the Marines, she did so you wouldn't choose her and stop being Rachel Berry. After everything, she finally got the one thing she wanted, only to give it up and protect you. I understand why she did it, although I wish is was a different 'it', but never doubt her love for you. Now on with the show, We have a date with the Wicked Witch."

Rachel hugged Quinn, "Thanks. You are my rock."

7 months later

Well if you had to guess, I'm not doing that great here. I miss you like crazy but I cant tell you that. Why would I show you that I'm that pathetic. Ahhhh I hate you so much…

Rachel balled up the letter and chunked it in the trash. "I cant do this anymore."whispered Rachel.

"What was that, Rachel?"questioned Voss. Voss was Rachel's co-star the her wildest dream come true, Wicked.

"Oh nothing. Sorry. Let's continue, please.", Rachel tried to continue.

"Something on your mind? Wanna talk about it? Whatever notes you have we can work them out. I mean, I'm going to be your new best friend for at least a couple of months, might as well cash in immediately." Voss had only know Rachel for a little while but she could tell something was extremely bothering her.

"No, it has nothing to do with you. Sorry, I haven't been focus today. I'm just missing somebody today. It's my birthday and they should be here.." pouted Rachel.

"Well, I'm sure they'll show up tonight. Now come on, no more pouting. This is a role of my lifetime and we are going to enjoy it. I wanna run through the beginning one more time, I seem to be rushing the movements." demanded Voss.

"Alright, alright. Voss, you are one lucky chica bossing me around like that. You know you remind me of someone. Anyway, go press play and we'll start." laughed Rachel as she walked onto the stage.

"Nice use of chica but next time, roll the 'ca'. Put some Latin flare on it."

Both girls laughed and started to practice as someone in the shadows snapped pictures from the top balcony.

To be continued…

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